I've been hiding {warning.. long post}

Some of you may have wondered where I was for the last month or so. I was really getting into blogging and enjoying it, and then I just stopped. 

Let me start from the beginning....

Around the end of November I started feeling really tired/depressed worn out. I just attributed it to stress and "winter blues". As the weeks/months went on my symptoms starting getting worse. I just thought it had to do with holiday stress, life stress, really just stress in general. Last year was hard year and I just thought it was all coming to a head.  On a side note, I have felt like this before and have gone to the doctor several times over the last few years, but it never really went away.  I just always blamed it on my job. 

sometimes you just aren't feelin' it

At the beginning of the year everything just kept getting worse instead of better. It was like I had PMS xs 10 and it NEVER went away. Another heartbreaking thing that started happening was I was gaining weight. Even though I was still exercising and eating healthy, the weight kept coming on (fast). I decided to go to the doctor. She said if I didn't get any better to come back in a month.

this isn't Sam, but it does look like him!

A month later, I was still not feeling any better and I went back to the doctor. I had some blood taken and a few days later I received a call from the doctor's office that my blood test was abnormal and I was referred to an Endocrinologist. The soonest appointment was 5 weeks away. Ugh! It was a long 5 weeks and my symptoms were starting to get worse. I felt totally helpless.

sometimes you just wanna hide under the covers

I had been eating healthy and exercising, but avoiding the scale. I felt horrible. My face felt puffy, my joints hurt, I felt irritable, depressed, anxious, just all over blah. From one doctor visit to the next I had gained almost 6 lbs (in about 4 weeks). My doctor was concerned about this and said it would be hard for me to gain that much if I had just stopped working out and ate junk. Total I had gained about 12 pound in about 2 months. I was very frustrated.

Finally I had my appointment with the endocrinologist last week. When I went into the office there was a sign hanging on the wall for "hyperthyroidism". I had almost every single symptom.

• irritable
• tired
• hair loss ( :( )
• anxiety
• unexplained weight gain
• puff face (I had been complaining about this by using these very words!)
• depressed
• joint aches

plus some others. After talking to the doctor she told me that my thyroid tested fine, but my prolactin levels were very high. Normal people are around 30 and mine were over 500! She said this was most likely caused by a benign tumor on my pituitary gland and she ordered an MRI (What?!?!). I was really caught off guard. I asked her why it seemed I had every symptom of hypothyroidism. She explained that high prolactin levels can mirror symptoms of Hypothyroidism symptoms, but  a lot of time get overlooked because the thyroid will test ok and the prolactin levels won't be tested, so the symptoms are usually just attributed to something else.

It was like everything was starting to fall into place. Remember how I said I had gone to the doctor before? I have actually had similar problems for almost 6 years. Doctors had prescribed antidepressants, anti anxiety medication and one doctor even told me that if  I was exercising like I said I would, I would be losing weight. There was always something to blame my symptoms on: stress, work, eating out, taking a day off working out, ect.

Where to go now?

The doctor told me to keep track of what I'm eating, and I had my MRI last week and should be able to get the results soon. Then we will have more information to work off of.

Unfortunately, if I want to lose the weight I am going to have to really focus on working out and eating clean. I really want to be rockin' a cute bikini this summer so I'm definitely going to try my best. It's not just about looking good, I also love the way exercising makes me feel, and I do love healthy foods.

yum!

So, I've decided to commit to this blog as an outlet for days I'm feeling frustrated and as a way to keep myself on track. I also want to be there for anyone else who is having similar problems and may need something to relate to. I am DETERMINED to not let this get the best of me. Much to my dismay, if I do get a pill or some other type of treatment to regulate my levels, it won't magically make the weight melt off (darn it!). Nope, I will still have to work just as hard to lose this weight as anyone else. I just won't have to work out twice as hard and lose half as much like I currently do.

source

I have missed my blog and am so excited to be writing it again! :-) One of the reasons I started this blog was to share my love of great food and exercise and show people that you can eat what you want (in moderation) and still maintain a healthy lifestyle.

Oh, and I can't forget that I love sharing pictures and stories of my fur babes.....

Now that you're updated, stay tuned for more of my regular posts!

Everyone have a great evening!